Topic: Conversations

Did I Mention 0

Voice One: “The big highway interchange in Mission Valley was designed by the grandfather.”

Voice Two: “I doubt it.”

Voice One: “He surveyed the whole thing and figured out where everything needed to go.”

Voice Two: “I think you’re mistaken.”

Voice One: “I have his surveying notes.”

Voice Two: “He worked for the City of San Diego but I don’t think he had anything to do with it.”

Voice One: “Did I mention my dead mother told me he designed it?”

Voice Two: “Dead mothers do tend to influence history.”

 

The Eternal Price of Liberty 2

A Conversation (Among Strangers on a Bus)

Voice One: “He shared secrets with the Russians!”

Voice Two: “Maybe he was trying to be frank.”

Voice One: “Or he’s a traitor in bed with Putin!”

***

Voice Three: “Over there is a statue of Lafayette.”

Voice Four: “He believed in the cause of liberty.”

***

Voice Two: “Radical factions ordered his arrest.”

Voice One: “If I’m considered a radical, so be it. They should arrest Trump!”

Voice Two: “No, Lafayette was arrested. Napoleon secured his release.”

Voice One: “Another dictator helping another.”

***

Voice Four: “I think you’re confusing the past with the present.”

Voice One: “Shut up! If you’re against liberty, then I don’t want to hear it.”

***

Voice Three: “Look there’s the White House.”

Voice One: “Probably already sold it.”

Voice Four: “Let’s go take a look before its gone.”

Voice Two: “The price of liberty requires eternal vigilance.”

Suicide Will Never Follow Your Murder 0

A Conversation

“Police are finding a lot of bodies lately.”

“Plenty of murder-suicides stacking up.”

“It says here he called 9-1-1 before the suicide.”

“Wanted police to find her body.”

“Murder is one thing, but suicide will send you to hell.”

“He just should have murdered her?”

“Just so you know, if I murder you I’m not going to kill myself.”

“So no suicide pact?”

“If I murder you, it’s because you needed it.”

“You’ll feel no remorse?”

“Wandering around hell? I don’t need that shit.”

Think About This 0

A Conversation

“Now think about this.”

“The pattern continues on in a spiral pattern and …”

“Think about this.”

“never ends until the entire shell is just a …”

“Think about this.”

“series of patterns that make up the whole.”

“Think about this. If you start with a square and add a equal square you will form a new rectangle. And if you continue adding squares to match the length of the longer side of the rectangle, it eventually becomes a bigger version of the first square.”

“Isn’t that what I just said?”

“It’s the Golden Mean!”

“The ratio of 1.62. I know.”

“But just think about it.”

Blood on the Sidewalk 0

A Conversation

“There’s blood on the sidewalk.”

“A homeless guy got beat up.”

“Shouldn’t that be washed off?”

“Probably.”

“Do we have anyone who cleans it up?”

“He comes on Fridays.”

“It’s been there two weeks.”

“He must have taken the week off.”

“It should be cleaned up. Should we call him?”

“I was on vacation last week.”

“But it looks bad.”

“I can’t be here for everything.”

“Listen, are we going to have to have a fight?”

“There’s no need to get hostile.”

“Keep it up and there’s going to be more blood on the sidewalk.”

[paypal-donation]

The Cure for Back Pain 0

A Conversation

“I’m just going to take a quick walk to stretch my back.”

“Does your chair tighten you up too?”

“Something awful.”

“I heard a rumor we might get new chairs.”

“I heard it too.”

“Either they give us new chairs or they supply us with an unlimited supply of Ibuprofen.”

“Honestly, either option couldn’t hurt.”

A Salesman at the Outdoor Expo on the Virtues of Maple Syrup 0

A Converation

“You should live in Vermont.”

“Why would I want that?”

“Vermont is a nice place for wildness.”

“Nine months of snow, two months of mosquitoes, and only two tolerant months.”

“There’s all the maple syrup you can eat.”

“I don’t even like pancakes.”

“Maybe you should try a stack with some real maple syrup.”

“You know what I do with my syrup now?”

“No.”

“I buy a bottle every three years just so I can throw it away.”

“You don’t like maple syrup?”

“Oh, I love it already mixed into my oatmeal.

“So, you do like maple.”

“You can make maple oatmeal even better by pouring maple syrup on it.”

“Sounds like you need to eat more oatmeal.”

Best Sex Ever 0

A Conversation

“He asked me to dance for him.”

“Seductive and sexy?”

“Not really.”

“I don’t follow.”

“He found a picture of me tapping when I was eight.”

“A little soft shoe.”

“I felt silly, but I went into my old routine.”

“You danced up a storm?”

“Until I tripped over my shoelace.”

“Broke a leg!”

“Landed in his lap laughing.”

“An awkward performance.”

“We just looked at each other until he suddenly kissed me.”

“And then what happened?”

“Best sex ever.”

[paypal-donation]

Frankly, My Dear, I Don’t Give a Damn 0

A Conversation

“Frankly, My Dear, I Don’t Give a Damn.”

“That seems like an odd thing to say to a woman”

“He’s frustrated and done.”

“I guess. But it still seems harsh.”

“She’s gone too far with the poking and running. He’s had it.”

“He certainly seems like a bear.”

“I think he still loves her.”

“Well, he sure has a strange way of showing it.”

“Maybe she just needs to bring him a Mint Julep.”

“Cause, all sorts of good things happen when you mix alcohol with them.”

What Do I Need to Do to Get Some Respect? 0

A Conversation

“I just don’t feel motivated or respected.”

“You hate your job?”

“Just the people. Nobody sees my contribution.”

“So you’re looking for a reward?”

“I would like to be respected and given a little credit.”

“For showing up?”

“For making this place work despite the lack of respect.”

“You received a paycheck this week?”

“Yes.”

“I think they must like you.”